Tips: Relocating For Your Partner
Did you know that those who relocate on behalf of a significant other are called “trailing partners”? Sounds harsh, but it’s not meant to be. You’re not taking a back seat to anyone, you’re just putting their needs ahead of yours for the moment. Perhaps you’re relocating with them because they got a job offer or promotion they couldn’t refuse. Or maybe they want to be closer to their own family and you have decided this is a good move. Whatever the case, these moving situations are often mutually beneficial and can be seen as a big opportunity for both parties.
Because you care deeply about your partner, you’re willing to pack up and move to another area of the city, state or even another state to support them in their next journey. This isn’t to say it won’t be stressful or pose some challenges. But with some planning, some soul searching and a willingness to remain open-minded, your relocation can go seamlessly.
Here are some tips for relocating with your partner.
Do Your Due Diligence
Before you agree to go anywhere with anyone, investigate and determine what kind of life you will both have post-move. List out the pros and cons of the move and ask yourself these difficult questions.
- What is the cost of living in the new city? If you are moving due to your partner’s promotion or new job with a higher salary, do the math to see how that pay increase on paper compares with the reality of a higher cost of living.
- Does your partner’s new job provide a strong possibility of moving further up the ladder later on?
- Are you moving to care for your partner’s parents or family? If so, determine if it makes sense for the two of you to move to them or move them to you? You have to also think about the fact that you would be leaving your own family behind, who may need your support at some point in the future.
- How will the move impact your kids, if you have them? Does the new city or town have a good school system? Is it safe with a low crime rate?
- Will you be able to take advantage of the opportunities behind your own hybrid or remote work?
- Can you even find a good job in the new location? Do you think the new location offers a comparable or rewarding social life?
Make Your Voice Heard
It’s common for trailing partners to feel a bit out of control, but try to look at the big picture. Once the two of you have decided to move, be an active participant in the process. In a situation like this, your partnership will have to bend beyond the usual 50/50 it make it work – at least for now. Hold some honest discussions and prepare yourself for a lot of give and take.
On top of sharing a home in the new place, as well as responsibilities, you have to come to terms with the fact that you will be leaving a job, family, friends, and a place where you felt totally comfortable, says NBC News. You will have to begin anew with a new job, new friends, and even a new gym and hairdresser. Prepare for that change and prepare to embrace it.
Schedule a Visit
While you may have already researched the new city online, it’s time to actually go and tour it before the move, if you can. This in-person visit will give you a better sense of what it will be like actually living there. Explore the city and all it has to offer. Get excited about what the new neighborhood has to offer. Go beyond the online reviews and do a deep dive into what really makes the city tick.
You may consider renting for a year or so before committing to a home purchase, just to make sure the adjustment is an agreeable and permanent one. This will serve to ease the transition immensely.
Whether your partner is starting a new job, receiving a promotion or taking care of an aging parent, remember that your partner is also facing a big change in their life that is just as scary to them as it is for you. Be supportive and understanding.
Facing a Relocation? Contact Luke’s Moving